It sure is cold here in Missouri. I think temperatures are in the twenties and low thirties throughout the entire week. To top this off, weather.com says that it is suppose to snow tomorrow and Thursday. We just had a rather large winter storm blow through here a couple of weeks ago; the ice still hasn't fully melted from it. Personally, even as much as I like snow, I would like to have at least 3 more weeks of clear skies. Though I suppose that it would be okay if it snowed a little bit. I took some nice photos of the ice and snow (and a couple of dogs) while the previous storm was at its peak. This next paragraph is going to get very personal and disgusting/disturbing with what I am going to write. Therefore I have included some "spoiler tags". If you want to read the next paragraph, highlight it with your mouse...and don't say that I didn't warn you .

Well, you were warned...this is kind of gross. I am in great pain right now because my right testicle is infected. Doctors are giving me antibiotics and some nice pain killers to try and remedy it. They think that I have a blocked sperm duct. I go see a urologist about this on February 5. Not that I don't trust a specialized physician or anything, but (and I'm sure every male would agree to this) I don't trust them. Doctors just might have to perform surgery in order to fix this "little" problem. I am very nervous and shy about this whole situation...hell I can even safely say that I'm scared about it. It is swollen to about two to three times the size of my left one. This isn't the first time this has happened either...it's a problem that reoccurs every three months or so. When I was a little kid, I slipped and fell in the shower. I landed so hard that it popped my pelvic bone out of place. Our primary care physician had to pop it back in to place. My parents think that when I did that, I I might have twisted a tube or something. Either way it should start feeling better soon (I hope); I can't even walk at a decent pace it hurts so bad (and that's with the pain medication I'm on.

I never did get around to watching Saint October, but I plan on doing so later tonight or tomorrow morning. I did get to watch another episode of Azumanga Daioh and Venus Versus Virus. The good people on 4chan don't seem to enjoy Venus Versus Virus as much as I do. I saw a "which anime is this" thread in /a/ with the manga cover of Ruchia on the front. Just as I was about to reply, I saw the thread had been flooded with troll posts. Half of the morons responded with "Bible Black" (though there were a couple of right answers). I'm really getting into Venus Versus Virus, but there is one thing I don't understand. Why make one of the main characters an inconvience? Sumire seems to hurt, rather than help Ruchia in exterminating viruses. Her only ability is her berserker mode. There's also a romantic relationship building up between a few people, which I find funny. I won't go into any more detail for the sake of those who have yet to see the series and would like to. I will post a couple of screencaps from episode 3 though. I'll post on Thursday; I've got class tomorrow night from 6:30pm to 9:15pm (and there's a real hottie in it ). Until next time~!

Well, it appears that Ruze does not want to submit anything. He said that he was going to review some anime and post recommendations. If he ever gives me anything, I'll put it up for him, but in the meantime I will continue on with an anime posting of my own.

I was rather bored on Friday and decided to hunt down new anime to watch. I found a list for the upcoming 2006-2007 anime shows and movies this winter season. That list can be found here. If you want to get the full list, then feel free to go there and read away. I have also been reading several anime-only blogs to get the scoop on this season. It's a very promosing season with some suprise licences and great movies such as Bleach Movie: Memories of Nobody, which came out on December 16, 2006. Many of the new series make a jump out at me. I am a big fan of the fantasy, sci-fi, shounen, romance, action and school life genres of anime. New series such as Venus Versus Virus (I've watched the episodes that are out) and Saint October (I am going to watch the first episode later on tonight) intrigue me. I am also going to look into series such as Ikkitousen - Dragon Destiny and Rocket Girls this February.

Venus Versus Virus is an anime that almost falls into the realm of Bleach; judging from the first few episodes I can say it's Bleach with girls and guns. It is about the Venus Vanguard: a group of people who specialize in the extermination of viruses. A virus is similar to a hollow from Bleach in the fact that it used to be human and it feeds on the souls of other humans. The main characters are Sumire and Lucia (Ruchia) -- they go around helping others by ridding the world of viruses via pistols and specialized bullets. I am not going to go into much more detail; if you want a better plot summary, go to Anime News Network and read theirs. Oh and one more thing. This anime is supposedly going to contain yuri later on in the series. Given the animation, that should be a plus n__n. Attached is a screencap of Sumire and her pistol. I'll write a full review on it after ten episodes.



Later today I plan on watching the first episode of Saint October. It doesn't seem as interesting as VVV, but I'm going to give it a chance. Again, after they air ten episodes I'll write a review on it.

Well I was aiming for a thousand-word post, but I guess that'll have to wait for another day. I'll post again Tuesday -- 100% guarentee. Oh yeah, happy birthday, dad!

Ruze is the winner of the "guess which anime" mini contest. He has informed me that he will be posting an anime review article (:O). I personally look forward to it! That's all for this post; just a quick update. The next post is hopefully reserved for Ruze. Picture is to celebrate me downloading the AIR series. Haven't watched it yet, but I hear it's pretty good. So anyway, look forward to Ruze's post! *skitters off to watch azumanga and air*

Haven't done much over the past four to five days. Played some video games, ate some food, slept around the house, stuff like that. I managed to get over my depression completely, get a hold of my sleep (I believe they were linked), and restore some form of order in my life.

I got over my depression in a pretty funny way. Every time I felt down and like crying, I just focused on others' misfortunes. It may sound like a bad way to handle things, but it sure did get the job done. All I did was think of how much worse than me some people have it. I hope my readers don't think of me as a "bad person" for thinking thoughts like that. If you do, then tell me what you do when you're feeling blue and I'll give that a shot.

Massive drugging eventually led to me sleeping well. I drank drinks and I took pills then eventually nodded off. Ever since then, my sleep schedule has been impeccable; I have been averaging 10 - 12 hours of sleep per day.

When I haven't been sleeping, playing my Gamecube, or watching anime, I've been eating. Now I try to eat right but sometimes it just can't be helped. I am addicted to ramen; I love the stuff almost as much as mint chocolate chip ice cream. When I'm cooking it, I start to drool. It's pretty funny actually, drooling over some noodles. For those that haven't tasted ramen, I reccomend doing so. The store-bought stuff is great, but what's really tasty (I haven't had the pleasure / honor of doing this) is ramen made by a specialized chef.

I'm gonna go eat a tad more food then watch some anime, I plan on writing again tomorrow. I'll be spicing comments up over the next few weeks, so keep an eye peeled. 1024 brownie points to the person who guesses what anime the picture is from. In fact, if you guess correctly I will let you make a post on Nerblog!

I didn't write yesterday because I was being bombarded with the ice storm. My trip to see my therapist was cancelled, plans on going to the bridge were cancelled, and going to the gym was cancelled. All this turmoil caused over just a little ice. At least yesterday it was "just a little"...

So what exactly have I been doing over the past couple of days? Well, I've been playing my Gamecube a little bit. I am still regretting cancelling World of Warcraft, I might buy the expansion soon after it comes out and play for just a little more -- we will have to see just what goes down. It may have wasted my life, but I feel that ceasing to play is a waste of my effort. I have totalled approximately over 120 days of play time logged if you count every character that I have ever played. Should I give World of Warcraft a second chance? Help me out here .

Today I operated on three hours of sleep. All this week, or at least since Tuesday, I have been waking up at 2:00am - 4:00am, no matter what time of day I go to bed. What really gets me is the persistence of the problem. Last night I thought I could beat it by staying up late...wrong! My plan that I spent twenty seconds devising totally backfired on me. I have tried up in excess of 150mg of Benadryl with no luck. I've even tried decaf herbal tea that said it makes you sleepy with no luck! Tonight I am going to try something that my mom compiled to help me doze off. I really do hope that I get some quality sawing logs time in tonight, because today at the gym I felt like utter shit...

I also watched an episode of Azumanga Daioh and FLCL today. I've seen FLCL many a time, but it's still a very good show. Since I have officially pulled out of my depressive swing, I am making a resolution to enjoy life more and watch more anime! In fact, that's what I am going to run off and do now! Picture today is the cover for Ghost in the Shell manga. I'm getting more obsessed with anime and the Japanese culture by the day. I hope to improve in my Japanese language skills one day and perhaps live there to study giant squid and program the computers of the ships . Bye~

Short post today (same old, same old). I have been totally out of it this week. My sleep schedule has been off and everything. I haven't been sick or anything, my mood is / was killing me. This whole week has been coated with massive bouts of depression. I'm not talking about your typical being sad; I was on my back bawling it got so bad. My doc put me back on an antidepressant so things should start clearing up for me very soon. This is the first time this week I plan on staying up past 10:00pm.

My class load is now totalling only a minuscule five hours this semester. Due to not being completely stable yet, my parents advised that I drop all but two classes. I listened to them because I think it's a pretty good idea. I will reapply for financial aid and also plan on enrolling to a full time status this fall semester.

That's about all I feel like telling the general public today. This week has been very personal, so there is not much that I am really willing to write about. I'll just post a weird picture and plan on writing again tomorrow as I have a therapist appointment and might go to the bridge.

My oh my was today a fun day. Let us see, where to start. Oh hell, I'll just write down the first thing(s) that come to mind...

I was still feeling a tad sick this morning, but pulled out of it as soon as I went to the gym with my dad. We ran around for a little bit, then I hoisted a fair amount of weight before I hit the showers. On the way back from the gym we stopped to get my grandpa a newspaper. When we saw him in the rehab center, he made a few wise cracks to me that sent me to a depressive swing. All this weekend I have cried because I have felt very lonely and constrained. Crying probably wasn't the best method to cope with these feelings. I had nobody to talk to about this matter save for my parents. I guess that it's just human nature to feel this way at times. Combine that with having a cold and schizophrenia, and you've got a really bad mix right there.

So then my mom suggested that I go out to the mall today just to "walk". Well during my trek I figured I might as well pick up some you-know-whats. After an hour at the mall and one stop elsewhere, I had three applications in hand. One for Sam Goody's, one for B. Dalton, and one for a local Game X Change. I was really happy about the Game X Change application. I have wanted to work there almost as long as I have wanted to work at a video store. They are almost one in the same! The hot lady seemed pretty eager to get me an application. After waiting for five minutes, she printed one off for me. I am going to return this application tomorrow around 3:00-5:00pm. I am also stoked about that Sam Goody's application. I am an avid music fan and it would be almost an honor to work at that store. I will turn in that application, along with the one for B. Dalton (a bookstore, for those who do not know), tomorrow after I pay a visit to Game X Change. Who knows, I might get a phone number along with that application to gxc because she seemed interested in me as well. Sure as an applicant, but also as someone else

Well I'm gonna have to cut the post out right here, 500 words or not. I have one last application to finish and some Azumanga Daioh to watch. Since I'm so happy about Azumanga, I'm going to sign out with yet another Azumanga Daioh image!

Sorry about the whole not posting thing yesterday. I was too damned sick to even wipe my own ass (don't quote me on that one though). Today's is going to be a small one as well. I feel a little bit better today, but I'm still not at 100% -- I'd say more along the lines of 75%. While I am not as congested, my muscles are tired and sore just from being sick. It's been so long since I've felt this way that I forgot exactly how much I loathe it.

Enough bitching about how illness has got me down. I haven't worked out for three days because of it, but come hell or high water that's going to change tomorrow. Today was a fairly slow day. Went on a road trip with dad to get some "bargain" jeans from a store in Granby, MO. Turns out the jeans literally fit two sizes too small and they cost 30 bucks a pair -- what a "bargain". I found a beautiful spot off of the highway that would be great for taking pictures at sunset; I think I'm gonna go there and snap some photos when I feel better.

A couple hours and a nap later, the family and I watched the Chiefs blow their postseason horribly against the Colts. After that, and just minutes before this post, I watched Rocky for the 9230590298590214th time . Watching that really helped me cope with my aching loneliness and massive amounts of boredom. Yeah, today was one of those days where you need a friend to hang around with, but there are none around. That's okay though since college starts up again on Monday. I've been pretty much minus a social life since late October when I had to withdraw from college due to hospitalization.

I haven't watched any Azumanga Daioh in two days now -- I think that I'm getting the shakes. I am going to have to watch some tomorrow afternoon after my workout. Speaking of workouts, next week is finally show time! That's right, finally I get to get up at 4:30am and be done by 7:00am. I know I've mentioned this in an earlier post, at least I think I mentioned it. Anyway, this week I'm finally timed thanks to college going on and everything . I think I'm going to wrap this post up and think about hitting the sack. 500+ word one coming tomorrow, I promise (and it will actually be well written!). Random image ftw; don't click the porn folder! Wonder what I'll watch after I'm finished with Azumanga Daioh...

Nothing to write about today -- I've been sick with the flu. I didn't even go for a small walk today; I've been on my ass sleeping most of the day and am *still* tired! Just going to say that a friend of mine got me hooked on a band by the name of Paramore. They are a pretty good punk band. I would give them a shot if you like this kind of music; plus the lead singer is hoooooooooooooooot. As of now they only have one album out, but it's one of those that will get you craving more. The singing/lyrics aren't enchanting like those of Evanescence or Lacuna Coil. They do have a unique sound though; I have not heard a band that sounds quite like them ever before.

I'm sick, so this is the end of the post. I have to go to Nevada tomorrow to see my therapist. Then if I feel well, go to the bridge and get some socialization in. Oh, and of course watch more Azumanga (I'm up to episode 14 now).

Today has been a fairly depressing day. In fact, the only fun I had today was watching some more Azumanga Daioh. Today, I did much reflecting upon my life. This post will be short, probably under 300 words if I can help it.

I have been thinking deeply about my life today. I am almost 19 and have never been kissed; barely even hugged by other women. In my spare time I sit in front of my computer and stare at the screen browsing message boards. All of my friends from high school, save one, are all gone. I had to withdraw from college last semester because of my condition. Therefore, I have no friends and have been sitting at my desk getting a monitor tan for the past month and a half. The only thing fun lately is getting up at 4:30 to lift weights. I can't even write properly right now -- it's sickening. Well, this is all about to change...

I'm going out on Friday night. I'll cruise around for awhile before going to a place known as "The Bridge", which is a complex where teenagers and young adults gather. Hell who knows, I might find a girl there. Either way I'm going to try to meet new people. I just hope I don't get into a fight right now; I can't afford being sent to jail for assault charges. Oh well, life sucks right now so I think I'm going to continue my trek of watching anime and listening to music while browsing web forums.

First of all, I would like to take the time to welcome everybody to the year 2007, even though I am late by one day. Now only five years remain until the great disaster (as predicted by the Mayans) occurs, so whatever you want to do, you have five years...gogogogogogogogogogogogogog.

Now that the task of wishing you all a happy new year is out of the way, I can resume blogging. I woke up at 4:30am this morning, as I will every weekday morning from now on, to work out. You want to talk about a shitty workout. I couldn't tell my weights from my own face I was so tired. My dad is my weightlifting partner, and he was just hammering the weights compared to me. He has also been getting up at 4:30am for years. I think that inside a month the gym will be a welcome site and I'll be tearing through the weights once again. Why am I getting up this early to lift? Well with classes and potential work on the horizon, this is the only time I have available to work out. Either way it kinda sucks because I have to hit the sack no later than 10:00pm or coffee can't even save me.

I went out to the University today so I could set up a loan for the spring semester. As it turns out, the financial aid office hasn't even processed my data yet! The lady I talked to said that I would have a loan available for spring. I still have my doubts about it though. What can I do if I don't get the loan money in time? I can't pay off $450.00 a month with just one job. I would have to be pulling two factory jobs and I could still barely cover it. I sure hope that the lady is right in saying that I'll have the money in time, or my ass is grass . I can't charge it on my credit card either because it has a $200.00 limit. I guess my only option would be to pick up those two factory jobs (or just one working seven days a week). Either way you do the math, it doesn't turn out good. At a $10.00/hr starting wage, I have a gross of $1600.00 per month. That's working full time for seven days a week. This would leave me no time at all to study and I would practically have to abandon my weightlifting. If I took a part time job at that rate, I would be earning roughly half of that for my gross. After taxes, it would probably wind up being $600.00 or something. So that would leave me $200.00 a month to pay for my insurance, gas, and other needs. Either option royally fucks me in the ass: work too much and don't study; work very little and be poor. I'd rather have the latter option for its free time, but I seriously doubt that I could land a part time job making that much to start with.

After seeing my shrink today, I went back to the Movie Gallery I applied to. As it turns out, I am one of two people that are in the running. My biggest fear is not having enough work experience; I've only had one job in my lifetime. Tomorrow I will go to the second MG in our town and apply there. Then on Thursday if I still don't hear back, I'm gunning for Blockbuster. I really want a job at a video store. Back in the day I even applied to an adult video store (they never called back). If all of these apps fail, then I'm headed for a Radio Shack or some video game stores. Hell who knows, I just might even look around at the mall a bit.

There was this fairly decent looking girl today that started to hit on me. I was really into it until her boyfriend came up and got angry with me. Thankfully a scene was avoided when I popped him in the stomach -- he quietly left me alone...well actually he cried. Normally I wouldn't do that, but he hit me first. I'm not good at just taking hits; I'm not a punching bag. I mean, I can take a decent punch to the face with no problem, but I just have to hit back. I'm sure my parents are going to flip when I tell them in just a few minutes. Plus, what the heck. Why would a good-looking brunette start to flirt with me when she has a boyfriend? Girls, you confuse me. Would one of my female readers please be so kind as to leave a comment explaining why one would do this action to begin with? I thought it was pretty damn rude of her to do that. It was also disrespectful to her unfortunate boyfriend. Perhaps they had relationship issues? I don't know, all I know is that I feel cursed. I get a girls phone number, *BAM* she has a boyfriend. I ask a girl out, *BAM* "broken leg". I've even had girls almost feign death to avoid going out on a date with me. Now how's that for a bum's luck? Oh well...sic vita est I guess.

I'm almost halfway done with Azumanga Daioh. The series just keeps growing better and better -- getting funnier and funnier. I actually had a dream about it last night. You want to talk about creepy, talk about an Azumanga Daioh dream where you're one of the students. My cat turned into Kamineko and kept biting the shit out of me. I think I'm just going to break on down and buy the manga. I can't find a torrent of even a single volume! I'm going to look on animenfo later on tonight to find related animes to Azumanga Daioh. I must have listened to the OST about four times already; it really is worth a listen or two. Send me an e-mail and I will send back both OSTs. They would have to be in separate e-mails of course, but I'm sure that's not really a big issue.